The case of Mr. str8...or is he??

It's been 2 months since he flew back into the country,but strangely i don't feel the excitement any more, you may ask what happened?? why the sudden detour in my line of thought??

the story goes back in April, oh yeah that fateful day. I had resigned long time ago that nothing good random will happen to me. So i log in to my facebook account and i get a notification. I got a friend request, i took no notice of it as i thought, this cold be from one of my many college friends, but a tingly feeling pushed me to act. I clicked it and alas, there is this dude, a distinct unique name and most of all HOT!! the irony was, we had no friend in common,,,,i rarely accept such request but this was an exception....as a flaming hot guy had just sent me a friend request?? wow i found myself singing to the song..it's raining men ( not ordinary men but stunning men) hallelujah!!!

and with that...a new chapter of my life began..one which started with a lot of hopes and expectation but as of now, going to the ruins with nothing to salvage.

So the in boxes started, the chats..all this time no hints by either party, just normal vibe..but deep down my masculine intuition(oh yeah the ladies have the femina one, i possess this and it never lets me down) told me there was more to this than I'd thought!!

He was cool..the conversation was great, i always found myself looking forward to the next conversation or in boxes, Oh boy within 2 weeks i realized i was getting hooked to this bromance thing. I wanted to badly ask him out but i couldn't master the courage,,,he just seemed perfect

surprise surprise,,come Friday and i get an inbox,,"can we hook up for juice or something, here is my no. 0723******* holla, am in town...." i nearly fainted...this was what id been longin for since God knows when..and it was soo random i wasnt even at my best....so my dreams or lust were soon to be sorted or did they??

...to be continued

Loosing grip, I am

it has been almost a year since i've know him, and today marks the 'death' of him.
I'm still trying to come to terms to all that i've done, silly things which we only see in series like desperate house wives...just to get his attention,but alas..i l finally bow out of th battle, or rather i think.

I keep asking myself. why cat i just get over him?? we have never met, yeah that makes it even more funnier? how do you obsess and like? love?? (ok whataver..i don't think i even know the meaning of either...) someone you have met?? oh yea ask me..ill tell you.

he calls himself my guardian angel, that why we will never meet? he has helped me mould myself to someone great but in maters of the heart am left all shattered, why wont he meet me?? or rather reveal himself to me??
I push him about it, n i mean PUUUUUUUSHH!! and today the holding brakes just snapped and he is gone...gone with the wind, i didnt need to hear any words to confirm that, but i've seen it coming all along, but my sturboon self wasnt jst ready to swallow it,, and even now i dont know how i will swallow it and move on..coz clearly im still hooked!!! whats with me and my addictions???and the saddest part, it all ends without me gettin chance to see him, feel him..flooded him with my love or lust?? call it whatever.....

my problem now is how will i move on?? should i just deactivate my account so that i dont see him online and avoid the tempatation to chat him up again?? he shoud just delete me, but he says he wont..now that more torture!!

while at that, yet another heart breaker is prowling my mind...now this one is intersting as he is supposedly straight and even introduced me to his girlfrend...yet we made out once and i could swear th boy wanted to eat me alive

hmmmmmm life life life....strange how all the people i like like, dont likey likey me back in response...time to learn to move on!!

.....to be continued!!